Letter Number 267

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Dear Daddy,
How are you? I hope you’re doing okay up there! Mum says you’re very happy there but since you’re so busy, you can’t call. She says you have loads of work and that if you had the time, you’d surely come visit us.

I don’t believe her, daddy. I think you’re punishing me. I think I’ve done something wrong, but daddy, don’t you think the punishment has already lasted long enough?

I’m so sorry for whatever it is that I’ve done. I promise I won’t ever do it again. Please accept my apology daddy and come back! I miss you so much. I will do everything you ask of me daddy, I promise, but just please come back.

Its father’s day this Sunday. I’ve decided that I’ll bake a cake for you. Mum says she’s going to help me but I want to do it all on my own. I guess I’ll have to take her help though. I don’t know how to bake a cake just yet.

We’re also having a performance for father’s day in school this Monday. I’m going to be singing. Miss Claire has asked all of us to invite our parents. I really want you to be there daddy. All of my friends’ fathers are going to be there. I wish you could too.

I’ll sing really well, daddy, if you come. Please say you will. I’ll be singing for you.

Angie turned seven yesterday. She’s the eldest in our group, you know? She had this huge birthday party and her father was there, clicking our pictures. Her father got a bicycle for her as well and he’s going to teach her how to ride this summer.

I want a bicycle too, daddy. Mum says she’ll get one for me next year, but I know she won’t. She says she’s waiting for the new model to come to the markets, but I know the truth. We don’t have enough money to get a bicycle.

Honestly we don’t have enough money for pretty much anything these days, but I don’t really mind, I’ve become used to it by now.

You know, daddy? I haven’t eaten an ice cream for months now, and how could I have? It was our tradition. We always had ice cream together. I can’t even think of having it without you, but it’s been so long. I don’t even know how Choco Chip tastes anymore.

I keep trying to convince Mum to have ice cream though. It’ll make her feel better, won’t it? She’s been crying a lot these days. Her eyes are always swollen and there are dark circles and wrinkles on her face now. She’s become ten years older in just a few months, daddy, and I don’t know how to help her anymore.

I think she misses you. She actually does miss you a lot. Maybe that’s why she’s been hurting so much. I don’t even know how to help her anymore, daddy. I can’t wipe off her tears when I’m more bent on wiping mine.

And I don’t want anybody to see my tears daddy. You were the one who told me to not cry in front of others, but it’s become so hard now.

I have to cry myself to sleep these days. Sara says this isn’t normal. She says I should tell Mum about it but daddy, how do I tell her that Mum does the same?


I have stopped gazing at the stars as well. Without you around, they just don’t seem beautiful anymore. They seem sad, almost lost. It’s like they’re missing something; maybe, freedom.

I don’t think they’re free, daddy. They keep tearing up, don’t they?

Daddy, you taught me how to hope but I don’t think I believe in hope anymore.

I don’t feel like waking up in the mornings either and I keep wishing that I don’t have to, but, I do, for Mum. 

You have no idea how much I miss you, daddy!

Life doesn’t seem happy anymore, and I’m so incomplete without you.  

I’ve even become scared of the dark these days. I don’t leave the house after six. Without you here to hold my hand and guide me through the streets, I don’t even feel like leaving the house anymore.

Please come back daddy. As hard as I try, I can’t live without you and neither do I want to.

You make me complete.

And I don’t want to be incomplete, daddy.  

I have to go now, daddy. Mum’s calling me for dinner. Even though I don’t feel like eating anything these days, I have to. Otherwise, Mum wouldn’t either.

This is my 267th letter to you. Mum keeps asking me why I don’t get tired of writing to you, when you never respond but I keep telling her that I know you do. I know you write back every day, daddy. I just haven’t gotten any of those letters yet.

I have to go now. Mum’s calling me again.

I will see you soon, daddy! I know I will.

Till then,
Love,
Your little darling,  
Emmy